Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Ouch

So its been awhile but I’m back.  I have been at a lack for interesting thoughts lately so I haven’t been an as active with my blog as I should be but this weekend was different.  I love Easter!  It’s an opportunity to reflect on Christ and His ultimate expression of everlasting love and that is so sweet.  I was especially excited for this Easter because my dad, step-mom, and little sister were planning on coming.  They are what I like to call CEO’s or Christmas and Easter Onlys’ but this year they asked if they could come rather than me begging them to join me.

Easter morning started out early, as it has for the past three years.  I have to opportunity to serve a lot during Easter.  I am pretty much around to do anything and everything.  Whatever people need I’ll do, its kind of like an all hands on deck type of time.  And I love it.  Spending time with so many different people and volunteers is something I enjoy most about this season.  Some of my greatest friendships have come out of these two days and it is something I really look forward to.  Anyway, I went to the sunrise service with my fellow slices and then made my way to the fair grounds at 6:30.  I spent most of my morning running around the amphitheater making sure things were where they needed to be.  In the business of it all I got a phone call from my dad that said that they were not coming to church. No specific reason, they just didn’t feel like it. 

Ok, lets back up.   My dad has a reputation for doing things like this.   Most of my memories of him also include some type of let down.   So, when this happened on Sunday it hurt.  In the craziness of the morning I didn’t take a lot of time to think about it but as things slowed down during Francis’ teaching the disappointment that came with that let down began to sink in.  As I listened to the message I was reminded on how much I want that for my family.  I long for those that I care about most to know and feel the love of Christ that I know.  And to think that they don’t is heartbreaking.

As the service ended I realized that a time that should be marked by true joy and celebration was outlined with pain and disappointment.  I wanted so bad for my family to be there and to experience the freedom I do.   In talking with a few you and some of my close friends about all of this I have realized that salvation is not my job its God’s.   And while it is ok to be disappointed and hurt reveling in that pain does no one any good. 
Instead I must continue to focus on the wonderful blessing in my life and how amazing this past weekend was.   I have a family that cares for me, friends who encourage me, and a community that continually points me back to who matters most, Christ.